Wednesday 11 February 2009

As Another Valentine’s Day Approaches…

If Cupid is the god of erotic love and beauty why does he appear always to be working extra time in keeping only women folk happy at this time of the year? You only need to step into a supermarket and their ‘valentines’ corner’ is an assault to the senses of the various shades of the colours pink and red. Since we, as men, are stuck with the colour blue (yellow is my favourite colour by the way), who keeps us happy at this time?

That chubby-cheeked overweight dwarf with a quiver and arrows has been hijacked by women all over the world as a sign of the affection of men and turned many men into psychologically-whipped mongrels. Maybe I should not be so narrow in my views as gays too probably employ his services. Valentine’s day is supposed to be when lovers express their love for each other however the flow of gifts, flowers and chocolates all seem to go in one direction: to the female side of the aisle.

In my university days, it was not uncommon for lads to take out girls and pay for everything – movies, meals, shows. Some used to steal, scrape, starve, scrimp and save in order to achieve this and it did not matter if they went without food for the next month. Those of us who had cars were luckier and could afford to spend little or nothing and still pull but an awful lot of pedestrians, especially those that were not from middle class families went celibate. Or went outside of campus to chase girls in the secondary schools of Ile-Ife.

Personally, I will not now date someone with no job, no car (I will not take you grocery shopping) or whose arms hang loosely by her sides whenever it is the time to pay, in other words, an elébi (hungry person). I seriously do not expect a woman to take me out all the time however, I think once to every five times I take her out would be a good compromise, and still she will be doing well out of it.

63 comments:

Afrobabe said...

Firsssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssttttttttttttttt

Afrobabe said...

OMG, I have never posted a comment that fast b4...lol

Jinta said...

afro, strictly, you have not posted a comment. lol

Afrobabe said...

Stingy man...mccheeeeew, I take back my first joh....

Afrobabe said...

oh yes I have, this is the 4th comment...first is a word init?

Jinta said...

~ afro ~ maybe you should be my valentine, that way i can mete out some punishment to you

Teeee said...

As Shacrown said, a partner is meant to complement you not burden you. There's nothing wrong with expressing love on Valentine's Day, its just that it should not be solely restricted to that day. What happens on the other 364?

Afrobabe said...

Stop using style to ask me oh...ask like a man...on one knee with ur credit card extended...Afro....u wont even finish before I say yes...credit card extended of course....Afro dont do cheap men...

Jinta said...

~ teeee ~ you're right, nothing wrong with an exchange if it goes both ways + 364 other days too

my point is that it appears men are mostly responsible for doing the expensive bit

~ afro ~ please ma, *all credit and debit cards outstretched* will you be my valentine?

Afrobabe said...

Yelz dear...

Unknown said...

dats it! Afrobabe, jinta...get a room LOL!

Hear! Hear!! 1:5 is not a bad ratio

Buttercup said...

i understand where u r coming from..its in times likes this i feel sorry for men..

btw yellow's my best colour too! :D

Jinta said...

~ afro ~ i'm forever grateful

~ ibilola ~ i think we'll get a whole mansion. you want afro to reject me?

personally, i dont even mind paying, however i take exception to the assumption that i always have to pay.

~ buttercup ~ thank you for feeling sorry for us, my colour sake.

did you try my remedy yet?

Rebirth said...

dont tell me u can be stingy....... i guess i would return that gorgeous yellow cashmere sweater i picked out for u.......
some women like me dont like paying but when the dude wants to turn into a scrub, ha! i run!

Jinta said...

~ funms ~ let's do the math. you have savings (according to your latest post), i don't and i still end up paying for every date?

now you see why i describe some of us as whipped mongrels?

having said that, if its cashmer and its yellow and its a sweater and its from you, i take back my earlier comment. i will pay all the time. lol

Bond Girl said...

I think we should ignore V-Day altogether. It makes no sense. Jinta what women have you been hanging with? I have a Yellow polka dot bikini!

iEsquire said...

I noticed something: only ladies have commented so far. Uncle Jinta, should we call you a ladies man? So much for not willing to be a whipped mongrel!

iEsquire said...

I noticed something: only ladies have commented so far. Uncle Jinta, should we call you a ladies man? So much for not willing to be a whipped mongrel!

Jinta said...

~ bond girl ~ ok, i like yellow but i dont think it extends to my underwear.

i have to re-examine the girls i hang with, dont i?

~ esquire ~ so says a man on whose blog only ladies leave comments. lol.

Jinta said...

~ esquire ~ come to think of it, women do this blog thing a lot more than men, it would seem

Kookie said...

I love your post, I fired cupid (see my blog for the reasons)

I forgot to mention in my post that yeah that's another thing that fat baby only focuses on women...so one sided

miz-cynic said...

i like to pay once in a while and im a woman but when i notice say u be scrug...i go properly fold my my hands for front...like one cheap skate i dated who gave me only cake and card and me i was buying designer perf and designer shirt....trust by next valentine all i had to give him was a kiss and a card.ts the love tht counts right?

Joy Akut said...

whos still talking cupid? i killed the little sucker:)

the shops might be filled with things screaming feminity, but have u ever thought that it might be an opportunity for men to explore their possible gay self, thats why i'll be buying a red thong with some red(perhabs yellow stilletoes for the one when i finally meet him........

i try to do my part in offering to split bills sometimes but i love my naija ego filled men, they just never let me.......so why insist, at least i try.

LG said...

jinjin' i be wan invite mysef but since u don invite afro' no wahala :)

Jennifer A. said...

LOL...

Do I sense some jealousy?

O'Dee said...

My hubby wants me to take him out on vals.
I actually can, but it my was treat the last time we went out, so its his turn this weekend.

For the love of me said...

Ah Jinta stop being Ijebu, take the poor gal out and splsh some cash. Don't you guys always say it's a man's world so the man should show he owns the world by owning some cash.

Jinta said...

~ k ~ i like that you fired cupid, i hope literally

~ miz-cynic ~ lol at your cheap skate. maybe the fellow also enjoyed being pampered and why not?

~ fq ~ killing cupid sounds like fun. call me for my opinion when you want to try on your thong

and the typical ego fuelled naija man, i beg let him pay if his ego demands it.

~ lg ~ my loss. when afro has finished with me and discarded me like a pip, maybe? *sob*

~ jaycee ~ see what cupid has caused?

~ oluwadee ~ perhaps he did xmas, easter and everything in between? go on, treat him, you know he deserves it

Jinta said...

~ for the love ~ you know its a man's world is why we end up being broke most of the time. how are you?

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

Ah, Jinta, you know that they will start calling you stingy, shebi? lol!!!!!!

Stop hating on the fact we women have turned Valentines into a 'worship the ground we walk on' event! Its good for the economy, its great for our sanity and if its good for us women, believe me, its good for you men as well! lol!!!!

Enjoy Val's day and I hope you have a great time with someone that is not an elebi oh! =)

Jinta said...

~ ms sydelle ~ i totally agree that if its good for you women, it must be good for us, at least for our sanity

lol @ being called stingy. i believe afro, funms and for the love already have me labelled. what can i say?

Nigerian Wedding Websites said...

*eyeroll* The man is supposed to be the PROVIDER!!!

I dont think its all about women though.

Rotflmao@going hungry to val a girl, it's all about getting her in the sack later.

Jinta said...

~ 'sewa ~ God is the provider, man only provides certain things. lol.

i agree it's all about ending up in the sack, but do we have to pay so much for it?

Nigerian Wedding Websites said...

Well, yeah. Nothing good comes free:o

LOL@God is the provider, true true,the provider for the provider.

Jinta said...

~ 'sewa ~ lmao, but we wont know how good it is until we try it, no? by which time we've spent all our pocket money for the year.

Joy Akut said...

the thongs supposed to be for the guys silly....

darkelcee said...

ok

i understand ur plight (lol)

Jinta..... please be my val! i will buy you chocolates.

Jinta said...

~ FQ ~ i thought so, but since i once tried one and found out that it was not serving its primary function, you may want to try it on for me?

~ darkelcee ~ ...and perfumes, and flowers and treat me to dinner?

Sherri said...

he he he
am laffing with u dude.

valentine's day is just another commercialized holiday joh!

i'll never understand how females expect equality and yet are unwilling to contribute equally...

Happy vals day!

Jay said...

Jinta..hope u had a fab valentines. Did Afro turn up then??

lol@lg...jinta..see how u dey cause trouble in blogsville

As per valentines...its for everyone but us women take it very seriously and you guys do get a lot out of it too...although i agree its commercialised but so is xmas and easter and weddings...infact nothing is sacred anymore. So bring that credit card out!

Hope u had a pretty valentine...

The Activist said...

Enoug of the traditional valentine role. Jintah I agree with you. There is nothing wrong in a woman taking her man out. Really. it's nice and fun to do so

Jay said...

i have come out or hiding but have changed url and name, swing by when u can

Jarrai-gambian girl

Buttercup said...

hey colour sake..i didnt need to try the remedy..lol..thanx anywayz!

how was val's? hope u got splurged on by some female??

Jinta said...

~ sherri ~ "i'll never understand how females expect equality and yet are unwilling to contribute equally..."

i like. trust you had a nice one too

~ jarrai ~ woe betide the man that does not take it seriously enough

~ standtall ~ it makes the man feel appreciated too

~ wordmerchant aka jarrai ~ i'm coming over

~ buttercup ~ fat chance of being treated by a woman. i avoided the celebrations but still ended up in a club for someone's birthday. dont know which one is more expensive

Ms Sula said...

Haven't been here in a while. I apologize darling! But I'm now all caught up.

Hope your cold is now a faint and distant memory.
I am so sorry about your friend's house. That is so sad.

Re:Valentine's day. I think it's what businesses and money makers want it to be. The target market for Valentine's ads(Adult women ages 18-50) are usually a marketing exec's wet dream. According to them, they make more emotional decisions than men...so they're more subjective to "fluffly spending" read more $$$ for them. I believe this is the root of the over-"red and pink"-ification of all things valentine.
But real ladies who love their significant others do indulge in something special for Valentine's day as well. My best friend just offered a green label Special Reserve Johnny Walker to her collector boyfriend. And that's one amongst many.

Anyways, as a fellow lover of yellow (and a closet hater of pink!!!), I sympathize with the eye assault inflicted on us by those bloody marketers (he he, I made a pun...)

All in all, there are still people out there who understand the meaning of the day. Hope you find one soon! :)

Zayzee said...

jinta, hope u spoilt her silly this val? i no like this can talk when its near val

Jinta said...

~ ms sula ~ welcome back. you abandoned me.

lol about hoping i'd find one who understands the meaning of the day. not sure i'm looking forward to that

~ uzezi ~ let's just say i still spent way too much more

Smaragd said...

obviously u can hear now, but still tetchy i see.

by jove Jinta! u are extremely cynical!

it's true that it should be sharing, but i have been accused of being "overly independent" because i tried to go halfway!

And i happen to know many girls who splurge on their guys for valentine and other events! same guys would however turn around and call them "Ruths". na wa.

The Indecent One..... said...

lol. I'm I the only one that doesnt see the need to spend valentine day with som1 u dont love regardless of the fact the both of u are in a relationship?

doug said...

Good show bruv! Thanks for taking up the gauntlet. These women think they can conspire with that rubicund little bugger to enslave us once every year. Well I say down with VALENTINE!!!!! DOWN WITH WEDDING ANNIVERSARIES!!!!! LIGHT UP THE TORCHES!!!!! IT IS WAR!!!!


PS- What is all this with you and Afro? Hmmmm?

Shubby Doo said...

LOL...jinta you have come again with your theories!!!...stop teaching this kind thing o! abeg…people shouldn't measure out what to give in a relationship...don't count and just give what you can to each other...simple...there is no formula to this jinta!!!

will also add that if someone isn't in it whole heartedly...they tend to want more than the other can give or they end up giving nothing back...my advice is send them packing because it is in giving that one receives...

how was vals day this year for you dearie?!

Jinta said...

~ smaragd ~ it appears that both men and women cannot win this. please be independent, its the insecure man that rubishes a woman's independence

~ inde ~ where have you been?

i confess i can spend the day without loving the person i'm with, but there must be some other attraction, yes?

~ doug ~ i think we should have a stockpile of weapons before declaring war. we've got to be cautious

lol. waiting for afro to kick me to the kerb when she's done

~ shubby ~ are you accusing me of being a bad influence? lol. i'm just pointing out the inequality

vals day for me was a strange one, come to think of it.

Buttercup said...

um..update s'il vous plez?

iEsquire said...

Yes, update please.

You can... by doing "two truths, one lie". Yeah, i just tagged you, check my blog for details.

rethots said...

...in essence, you will not....a woman who is not independence but, once the relationship has kicked off can become interdependence.

I am totally spot-on with you on this (but, i can one without a car though); however, she must be responsive.

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

Jintus! How you dey?

anonymous gal(retired blogger) said...

Kai i hv missed this blog.Jinta last val u suggested we sell flowers.sadly val has passed else we would have done that.
The men of nowadays, they pretend the have to work on vals day anything to dodge buyin a gift. so i dealt wit them i went out of my way and spent good money on a chocolate cake 4 me to me. u shld have seen the envious glances men gave me as i worked out with my bounty.The women did not spare me either i got looks that i interpreted to mean r u 4 real u spendin that much money on a cake 4 him?

anonymous gal(retired blogger) said...

o and 4 the record if a gal pays 4 a date a good number of men would expect her to do it the next time, and the next and the next...im sure u get the picture-i know this 4 a fact,or they would wonder if you are trying to make a point and the mongrels (pardon my french) get intimidated.
besides we women date men who are richer than us so it understandable that they should buy more expensive gifts.
and b4 im accused of having feminist views i agree it should b a 2 way thing,,,the gift buyin. sadly women sit bac and leave it to the men.

Sade said...

well i don't think there's anything wrong with buying expensive gifts for women as long as he can afford it even if he saved for months to buy them. He's to take care of me, be my head and head of the home.

Jay said...

Jinta...you know spring is here right??? please update, otherwise i will stalk u....yes,its a threat :)

Thirty + said...

VALENTINE, is that a consonant or a verb. Is it a noun or pronoun - lol.

Jinta let the women folk enjoy jo, don't be jelux, just be satisfied with your FOOTBALL.

Jinta said...

~ buttercup ~ i don hear, my sake

~ esquire ~ i will do the 2 truths and 1 lie shortly

~ rethots ~ responsive to what o? you're scaring me. lol

~ solo ~ i'm fine thanks

~ anon gal ~ so you treated yourself when there are many men out there who deserve to be treated? chei!

~ sade ~ good thinking, however, will women really allow him to head the home and i dont just mean by paying all the bills?

~ wordy-jarrai ~ it is spring indeed, not that you would know with this weather

~ 30+ ~ where have you been?

EXSENO said...

Having a son, I tend to agree with you. I think Valentines's Day is all one sided and unfair to the man.
I think it is a stupid practice and all one sided.

I think it should either be banned or it should be re-invented to include the man to be getting not just giving.